How are we doing, friends? Good, tired, indifferent?
Lately, I've noticed a quickening pace to life, a faster cycle really. It sometimes revolves around blog posts, but it's more the social things and calendar invites, causing months to fly by.
With these changes, a few questions hit me in the gut this week:
Don't get me wrong, I like being social and coordinating events for folks to connect, but the desire to be known is a fine line to walk. It shouldn't be about checking things off a "ten ways to be popular" or "do this for instant success in relationships" listicle. Instead, the desire should simply be to serve the community and enjoy the company of others.
Fortunately, steps taken last month to better prioritize sleep and physical fitness came at just the right time, preparing me for everything that would transpire this month. I didn't know that then , so I'm very thankful it happened now.
Work, work, work, work, work
No, not Rhianna. And not Drake. (But I did see Adele this month!!) I'm talking about actual 9 to 6 work.
With this, it's easy for me to get anxious about performance and career trajectory. I want to do things well and do them fast. I like the idea of promotions paving the way to a long, healthy career. But that can't be my sole focus, and I don't want it to be my identity marker.
Thankfully, my boss has been very kind in providing feedback and working with me to discover the best ways to grow, both short and long-term. And in light of a few changes and new responsibilities, I feel like the Lord has given me a new peace in terms of my career.
We were made to work and to do it well, but it doesn't always have to be at the pace (or with the expectation) that I allow myself to demand. For instance, my parents have been working hard (and well!) for over 30 years. And here I am "restless" after 2 years? It's been a humbling month in this regard.
(Side note: I love my team and am so grateful to be working for this company. If you ever have questions about eyewear, please comment below or email me directly—I'd love to get you fitted in a great new pair of eyeglasses or sunglasses. In the meantime, go give us a follow on all social platforms: username is warbyparker!)
You got a friend in me
Another big thing this month revolved around friends in the city. I've finally lived here long enough to experience the "farewells," which is weird and happy and bittersweet.
Because of this, I've felt much more convicted about my role in friendships and how I relate to a larger "friend group." For too long, I passively consumed, needing time to feel comfortable: the whole "I'm an introvert, so it takes me longer" mindset took control. This is not an excuse I want to let fester any longer.
Back in July, I talked a little bit about this, but the topic has continued to evolve as the dust of summer settles. Ultimately, I've found that it's super easy to ride the coattails of a larger community group by attending social event after social event. It's easier to feel like you've really connected with someone, but then you basically can't remember topics discussed once the party ends.
While good conversation can happen in these settings, I don't think it will happen every time. We also run the risk of having the same conversations over and over again without any closure or deeper dwelling on the topic. We (or I) fail to ask the follow up question.
I'm praying that the Lord will settle my heart and allow me to lead by building deeper relationships as He sees best fit, and I hope the same for you.
A few final thoughts
Initially, I see both of these requiring more time. We should devote ourselves to knowing people better. I also think this can be more successful with a slower and steadier approach, prayerfully considering who the few (yes, just a few) folks are that you can really touch/help in this way. It's also important to pray that someone(s) can do the same for you.
Has anyone else been thinking about these things? If so, I'd love to hear how you're processing all of it.